Wednesday, February 01, 2006

February 1, 2006 9:55pm

Just when I think my life is figured out, something comes crumbling down.

I thought I had the whole marriage and family thing settled. The career was well on its way. Now, I feel like I'm only half done.

Although I feel mostly okay, I still have these random moments of angrer where I scream at him as if he's here and I can tell him something really hurtful.

But, I can't bring myself to hate him.

I don't understand how someone can just drop off the earth after sharing a bed for years and years.

As confusing as it is, it's still perfectly clear now where he is emotionally and his level of understanding of how to be in a relationship.

Most of the calls and emails from my friends have trailed off. I guess people assume I'm okay now...except for one. So confused about that. But that's a story for another time.

It's going to be weird going home. Especially if we bump into each other somewhere. I tried to make that less awkward by trying to make contact with him, but he isn't responding so I guess we're going for awkward.

No comments: