My family is dysfunctional.
I know, I know... everyone's family is dysfunctional in some way.
The problem with mine is that nobody admits to the fact that we are a mess.
The motto of my family seems to be "act as if..."
Act as if nobody is bitter for things that happened to them 45 years ago. Act as if there is no unspoken animosity between one brother and a brother-in-law because of his drinking and occasional outbursts. Act as if we actually want to be around each other when we're really just trying to eat as quickly as possible to get back to our private, solitary lives.
I love my family. I really do. It makes me absolutely crazy to sit in the insanity of it all, though.
Those of you familiar with my Big Fat Thanksgiving Dinner episodes already know some of this.
There's my mom... educated, stable, sensible, and unable to admit that there are any problems...EVER. Everything is fine. She criticizes families that do not "get along", yet she's completely blind to the fact that our own family is filled with anger and tension. I admire families that don't get along and are open about it. At least it's honest.
My uncle will never admit that he's still angry that his father left when he was 5. He will never admit that he's bitter about the way he was raised by my grandmother, and a very female-centered family. He will never admit that he feels like my grandmother always resented men and, therefore, him. He will never admit that he feels like his whole life was miserable because he was raised without the influence of a man. Instead, he makes occasional cynical remarks about his childhood....seemingly out of nowhere. "I heard that Osama has a few dozen children. Imagine being the child of someone so awful?" Well, at least they get to HAVE a father and know where he is! Don't tell me they have a tough life. I KNOW what it's like to grow up without a father. I could do the Osama-dad deal in my sleep. Sheesh!
That's a slight exaggeration, but you get the general idea.
My aunt will never admit that she is bitter that she never had children. She will never admit that she never intended to work, and always wanted the life of the good little wife and mother at home. Not being able to have children threw off that whole plan. She resents any woman who has children and is unhappy for even a moment. How dare someone be unhappy when they have something she could never have? She's angry that she has had to work all these years. She will never admit that her husband has a drinking problem. That he can't go a day without liquor. He says totally inappropriate things. He doesn't know how to behave in public. He cuts people down who have an opinion different from his (particularly me). He is extremely anxious, almost to the point of paranoia when it comes to worrying about money, politics, events, work, whatever.
God forbid anyone ever gets some therapy for their problems. I swear I'm going to have to start crushing Xanax into everyone's food when they come to my house...just to take the edge off.
Nobody will admit that these problems exist.
I try my best to deal with it.
I'm going to be having my family over to my house for our Christmas Eve Wigilia celebration this year. I look forward to the decorating and the cooking. I like putting a small gift at everyone's place setting. I enjoy doing all of this even though I know what is going to happen. If I cook something even remotely interesting or try a new recipe, it will be met with an attitude that just makes me want to vomit. I am treated like a child bringing a peanut butter and bologna sandwich to the table for everyone to share. It's as if they are saying "Oh, how cute. The little one used the stove all by herself!"
The actual comments are more like, "Oh, this is interesting. Why did you decide to make this?" or "Since when do we eat Lamb in this family?" or "Well, I'm usually not too crazy about this. It's not my favorite type of food. Why do we have to have food like this?" For the love of Fabio! I just put some capers on the salmon before baking it! You'd think I brought in jellyfish or something from Fear Factor.
Between courses (Wigilia is a 7 course meal), nobody wants to sit and relax and talk. No, no no. "Okay, let's get the next course out now!" "Let's get this going!" "Let's get this show on the road!"
As soon as dessert is done, everyone is out the door before the last person has drained their coffee cup.
Last Christmas, I put a small gift at everyone's place setting. We haven't exchanged gifts as a family for years, and a gift at everyone's setting is something that I remember having when I was a small child having Wigilia in my grandmother's house. So last Christmas Eve I hosted Wigilia myself and everyone got a mug with my school's insignia on it, and a few of those scratch-off lottery tickets in the mug. Not a very expensive item, but I thought it was a nice little surprise at everyone's place setting.
Here were some of the comments I heard"
"Oh, why did you do this?"
"What am I supposed to do with this?"
"I didn't know we were exchanging gifts again!"
"I thought we weren't doing gifts anymore."
Only after all of that settled out, and after I had to explain myself for why I decided to give everyone a small gift did I hear the first "Thank you, Elizabeth."
Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment. This year I am going to do the same thing. Everyone will be getting a small coffee grinder (one per couple), a tablespoon coffee scoop, and a bag of my new favorite coffee, Boca Java. I'm really excited about this because I get to introduce my family to something that I really enjoy.
On the other hand, I'm really dreading the comments I might hear.
"Oh, we have soooo much coffee! I bought 10 cans of Folgers when it was on sale at Pathmark!"
"We never grind our own coffee. It's too much trouble."
"What prompted this?" what the hell does that even mean? every time I do something for my family they say this, though!
"Oh, so we have to grind our own coffee now? Guess you thought we didn't know how to make our own! Ha Ha Ha!" an attempt at sarcasm
Sigh
If anyone would like to join me for Wigilia, please come to Manasquan. I would be happy to have a few more at my table. Particularly someone who would like their own coffee grinder and kick-ass freshly roasted beans.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Pictures from Canaan!!
They still have the ski lift open so you can go to the top of the mountain. The whole ride up, I kept wondering how strong those cables were and how likely it was that we would go crashing to our death.
Apparently, Roger didn't have the same concern.
How can you not love a place that puts a rubber duckie in your bathroom?
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
September 26, 2007 5:32pm
Woke up to this in my email...
Hi My Elizabeth,
Good Morning, My Love. I woke up this morning and I realized that I miss you more than ever.
I can't wait until I go home to you, I hold you in my arms every night, I wake up next to you every morning.
I love you!
"Your" Roger
::giggle::: :::snort::::
Hi My Elizabeth,
Good Morning, My Love. I woke up this morning and I realized that I miss you more than ever.
I can't wait until I go home to you, I hold you in my arms every night, I wake up next to you every morning.
I love you!
"Your" Roger
::giggle::: :::snort::::
Sunday, September 23, 2007
September 23, 2007 3:01pm
Roger came down for the weekend. We went to Canaan Valley resort (pictures to follow soon). Had a lovely time. Relaxed, ate some good food, hiked, swam, relaxed some more.
I have my panties in a bunch right now because I am wondering why certain people can't return phone calls. You call people to, say, just chat for a bit, tell them some news, wish them happy birthday, or whatever....and they never bother to return the call. I don't mean just not that day, I mean not for weeks and weeks...or ever.
WTF?
I have my panties in a bunch right now because I am wondering why certain people can't return phone calls. You call people to, say, just chat for a bit, tell them some news, wish them happy birthday, or whatever....and they never bother to return the call. I don't mean just not that day, I mean not for weeks and weeks...or ever.
WTF?
Thursday, September 20, 2007
September 20, 2007 8:26pm
Remember Dr. Krazy who I mentioned a few times?
Well, the shit finally hit the fan.
Here's the short version:
I notified my school about his abusive behavior toward me and toward his staff. I was quickly pulled off the rotation and reassigned to a different doctor in the same specialty. An investigation soon began and I was asked to give an official statement about my experiences with Dr. Krazy.
Shortly after, members of his office staff were also called up to administration and asked to give statements on their experiences with him.
At this point, I began to feel terrible. While I was relieved to be off that rotation, his staff was taking even more abuse as he became suspicious that the administration was out for him. Monday was the day that staff members were called to give statements.
Tuesday he abruptly resigned. Nobody knows the details. He had a full day of patients scheduled and he planned to see them, as well as have office hours for the rest of the week. Early in the day, he was called away for an "emergency". Shortly after noon, we were informed that he resigned. Within an hour, the door codes were changed and his name was removed from the building before the next day.
There seems to be a mixed reaction at the hospital. It has created quite a bit of turmoil because now there isn't anyone to do certain medical tests. This creates a huge compliance issue for the hospital, not to mention financial difficulties.
I feel terrible. His remaining staff now are fearful for their jobs. They worry that if another doctor isn't found soon,, they will be out of a job. I don't really see this happening, but it is a very real fear for them. One of the nurses from his office won't even look at me now. On the other hand, his PA is smiling brightly. The nursing supervisor at the hospital gave me a hug and thanked me the day this all happened.
I feel a little like Norma Rae, but less sweaty and without a kerchief tied to my head.
I also feel like I created a disaster. I feel like this is all my fault. I really just wanted to get myself out of a bad situation, and if I was able to help other people not be abused at work then all the better. But now it seems that isn't what anyone wanted.
Well, the shit finally hit the fan.
Here's the short version:
I notified my school about his abusive behavior toward me and toward his staff. I was quickly pulled off the rotation and reassigned to a different doctor in the same specialty. An investigation soon began and I was asked to give an official statement about my experiences with Dr. Krazy.
Shortly after, members of his office staff were also called up to administration and asked to give statements on their experiences with him.
At this point, I began to feel terrible. While I was relieved to be off that rotation, his staff was taking even more abuse as he became suspicious that the administration was out for him. Monday was the day that staff members were called to give statements.
Tuesday he abruptly resigned. Nobody knows the details. He had a full day of patients scheduled and he planned to see them, as well as have office hours for the rest of the week. Early in the day, he was called away for an "emergency". Shortly after noon, we were informed that he resigned. Within an hour, the door codes were changed and his name was removed from the building before the next day.
There seems to be a mixed reaction at the hospital. It has created quite a bit of turmoil because now there isn't anyone to do certain medical tests. This creates a huge compliance issue for the hospital, not to mention financial difficulties.
I feel terrible. His remaining staff now are fearful for their jobs. They worry that if another doctor isn't found soon,, they will be out of a job. I don't really see this happening, but it is a very real fear for them. One of the nurses from his office won't even look at me now. On the other hand, his PA is smiling brightly. The nursing supervisor at the hospital gave me a hug and thanked me the day this all happened.
I feel a little like Norma Rae, but less sweaty and without a kerchief tied to my head.
I also feel like I created a disaster. I feel like this is all my fault. I really just wanted to get myself out of a bad situation, and if I was able to help other people not be abused at work then all the better. But now it seems that isn't what anyone wanted.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
September 16, 2007 12:35pm
I am always being told that I am going into medicine at the "right time".
Am I really?
First, is there ever, truly, a "bad time" to go into a field that will never lose its usefullness? Is it ever a bad time to go into something, such as, the funeral business? "Oh, this is a bad time for the funeral business. Not many dead people these days."
On the other hand, do people think this is a particularly good time to go into medicine just because healthcare is a hot topic? Wouldn't that mean that now is also the time to get into the mortgage business?
I worry that I am of the wrong personality type to go into medicine as it is now, and how I fear it will be in the future. With the 2008 election looming and the she-devil Hillary presenting her absurd plan to get our government even more involved in healthcare, I feel like senators will be making decisions on a patient's health more than the physicians. I already see shades of that when Prescription A isn't covered on someone's formulary, but Prescription B is...even though I know that Prescription A is waaay better for this particular patient.
Why are we so willing to give up our freedom in choosing our care? Because it is perceived to be "free"? It is not free. Imagine making about 25% less than you do now. Look at your paycheck after taxes. Take off an extra 20-25%. That's what you would take home. Lovely.
The expansion of SCHIP and its adorable commercials with cherubic children asking for their school shots is equally nauseating. They don't show the not-so-cherubic 25 year old still-living-at-home-while-attending-community-college-and-working-at-Starbucks who is also eligible for this "children's" health plan. They also fail to mention that the money for it is coming directly from Medicare Advantage (more like DisAdvantage).
And in the frightening statistic of "45 million people uninsured", why do they fail to mention the percentage of them who are illegals and, therefore, should not be eligible for anything anyway! Or what about those who have health insurance available to them through their work but they choose to not get it because they think they are young and healthy and would rather buy an xbox? Let's look at more realistic numbers before we decide to create major overhauls of the current system and give our government yet even more control over our personal health decisions.
Even more absurd is the notion of a person who has made his money by suing the healthcare industry an office in the White House and the authority to decide that everyone needs to see a doctor. Preventive care is all peachy keen in theory, but the jury is still out on the cost effectiveness of it.
I don't know what the best solution is. I do know that the ones currently being presented aren't it.
My idea? Everyone purchases and super duper high deductable insurance plan and then gets to put before tax dollars into a health savings account that rolls over from year to year. For most people, this will get you through your yearly physical, the occasional Tylenol (just save your receipts and you can be reimbursed from your HSA), a minor kitchen accident, and a sinus infection. If, heaven forbid, you get really really sick, you will run through that deductable in a New York minute and your insurance will kick in.
The truth is that most people, particularly young people, don't get very sick. I know as well as anyone that there are exceptions to that. But I don't think anyone can argue that the majority of people under the age of 40 or even 50 do not have major medical problems.
And then on the other end of things is the money spent on caring for the elderly. Maybe we, as physicians, need a more realistic plan for what to do with our patients. Why do a test on someone when you know you will not do anything about the result? For example, someone is 85 years old, has diabetes, hypertension, and conjestive heart failure. If they have colon cancer, they would not be a good surgical candidate. So, why do a colonoscopy on them? Why put them through the torture of that, and the expense of that just to say "yup, you have a tumor. no surgery for you, though." Your management of them would be no different if you didn't know what was wrong with them to begin with anyway!
I saw a woman a few weeks ago in the office who had a very slow heart rate. She is in her 70's, demented, and sits in a wheelchair all day, stares at the ceiling and hums. The only thing the cardiologist could recommend was a pacemaker and an implantable defibrilator. After explaining to her family what all of this would mean, they quickly agreed to send her off for surgery. Her daughter was wearing a t-shirt that had "You Must Be Joking" printed on it. I sincerely wished she understood the irony of that. Those were my thoughts exactly as she was telling me how she just wanted to get mom's heart better. "You must be joking." Mom doesn't know who you are! $30,000 later she will go home from the hospital, just to continue sitting in the chair, staring at the ceiling, and humming.
I wouldn't begrudge her right to have this surgery, but I do wonder about the ethics of it. I also wonder about the ethics of spending that kind of money on someone who is in her condition. On the other hand, it is the right of her and her family to go through with this, as idiotic as it may be. But if we lose our personal choice in our care by hanging over the responsibility of all payment to our government.....would she even be able to make that decision? Would the long shot ever even be tried? Doubtful.
Am I really?
First, is there ever, truly, a "bad time" to go into a field that will never lose its usefullness? Is it ever a bad time to go into something, such as, the funeral business? "Oh, this is a bad time for the funeral business. Not many dead people these days."
On the other hand, do people think this is a particularly good time to go into medicine just because healthcare is a hot topic? Wouldn't that mean that now is also the time to get into the mortgage business?
I worry that I am of the wrong personality type to go into medicine as it is now, and how I fear it will be in the future. With the 2008 election looming and the she-devil Hillary presenting her absurd plan to get our government even more involved in healthcare, I feel like senators will be making decisions on a patient's health more than the physicians. I already see shades of that when Prescription A isn't covered on someone's formulary, but Prescription B is...even though I know that Prescription A is waaay better for this particular patient.
Why are we so willing to give up our freedom in choosing our care? Because it is perceived to be "free"? It is not free. Imagine making about 25% less than you do now. Look at your paycheck after taxes. Take off an extra 20-25%. That's what you would take home. Lovely.
The expansion of SCHIP and its adorable commercials with cherubic children asking for their school shots is equally nauseating. They don't show the not-so-cherubic 25 year old still-living-at-home-while-attending-community-college-and-working-at-Starbucks who is also eligible for this "children's" health plan. They also fail to mention that the money for it is coming directly from Medicare Advantage (more like DisAdvantage).
And in the frightening statistic of "45 million people uninsured", why do they fail to mention the percentage of them who are illegals and, therefore, should not be eligible for anything anyway! Or what about those who have health insurance available to them through their work but they choose to not get it because they think they are young and healthy and would rather buy an xbox? Let's look at more realistic numbers before we decide to create major overhauls of the current system and give our government yet even more control over our personal health decisions.
Even more absurd is the notion of a person who has made his money by suing the healthcare industry an office in the White House and the authority to decide that everyone needs to see a doctor. Preventive care is all peachy keen in theory, but the jury is still out on the cost effectiveness of it.
I don't know what the best solution is. I do know that the ones currently being presented aren't it.
My idea? Everyone purchases and super duper high deductable insurance plan and then gets to put before tax dollars into a health savings account that rolls over from year to year. For most people, this will get you through your yearly physical, the occasional Tylenol (just save your receipts and you can be reimbursed from your HSA), a minor kitchen accident, and a sinus infection. If, heaven forbid, you get really really sick, you will run through that deductable in a New York minute and your insurance will kick in.
The truth is that most people, particularly young people, don't get very sick. I know as well as anyone that there are exceptions to that. But I don't think anyone can argue that the majority of people under the age of 40 or even 50 do not have major medical problems.
And then on the other end of things is the money spent on caring for the elderly. Maybe we, as physicians, need a more realistic plan for what to do with our patients. Why do a test on someone when you know you will not do anything about the result? For example, someone is 85 years old, has diabetes, hypertension, and conjestive heart failure. If they have colon cancer, they would not be a good surgical candidate. So, why do a colonoscopy on them? Why put them through the torture of that, and the expense of that just to say "yup, you have a tumor. no surgery for you, though." Your management of them would be no different if you didn't know what was wrong with them to begin with anyway!
I saw a woman a few weeks ago in the office who had a very slow heart rate. She is in her 70's, demented, and sits in a wheelchair all day, stares at the ceiling and hums. The only thing the cardiologist could recommend was a pacemaker and an implantable defibrilator. After explaining to her family what all of this would mean, they quickly agreed to send her off for surgery. Her daughter was wearing a t-shirt that had "You Must Be Joking" printed on it. I sincerely wished she understood the irony of that. Those were my thoughts exactly as she was telling me how she just wanted to get mom's heart better. "You must be joking." Mom doesn't know who you are! $30,000 later she will go home from the hospital, just to continue sitting in the chair, staring at the ceiling, and humming.
I wouldn't begrudge her right to have this surgery, but I do wonder about the ethics of it. I also wonder about the ethics of spending that kind of money on someone who is in her condition. On the other hand, it is the right of her and her family to go through with this, as idiotic as it may be. But if we lose our personal choice in our care by hanging over the responsibility of all payment to our government.....would she even be able to make that decision? Would the long shot ever even be tried? Doubtful.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
September 15, 2007 7:01pm
To all Bad Guys in the area:
I had to break two windows and bust through a screen today to get into my house after locking myself out. Please do not try to break into this house until after I have had a fair chance at repairing the damages. It really would not be very polite of you to do that, since I have had a very rough day now. Also, I am a student and make no money. I really don't have anything of much great value here. It would not be worth your time or effort (though at the moment, no great effort would be required) to get inside. You might even decide to leave me something if you did get in.
Thank you
One more thing, I have a boyfriend and I'm not afraid to use him.
I had to break two windows and bust through a screen today to get into my house after locking myself out. Please do not try to break into this house until after I have had a fair chance at repairing the damages. It really would not be very polite of you to do that, since I have had a very rough day now. Also, I am a student and make no money. I really don't have anything of much great value here. It would not be worth your time or effort (though at the moment, no great effort would be required) to get inside. You might even decide to leave me something if you did get in.
Thank you
One more thing, I have a boyfriend and I'm not afraid to use him.
September 15, 2007 3:58pm
Time for some updates.....
1) Dr. Krazy's bullshit grated on me just a bit too much. I reported his antics to my school, and they pulled me off his rotation the next day. He then proceeded to make a total ass of himself by accusing my school of being racist. He said that they moved me to a new Dr because they found a "white" doctor.
I felt a little bad because I've never wanted to be that woman, but I think this was justified. The hospital is currently investigating his atrocious behavior.
2) I went home for Labor Day Weekend. Spent some lovely time with Roger.
Roger took this picture of our shadows on the beach. :-)
3) Congratulations to my beautiful (and older :-X) niece, Macon. She is now engaged! Looks like there will be a wedding coming up!
4) The new Dr I am working with is quite nice. Not the kind of person you'd hang out with and have a beer, but it is a much better situation than what I was in. At least I'm not taking daily abuse.
5) The weather here in WV has become just beautiful. Bright, warm sun and 59 degrees. I am quite content here right now.
6) My hands shake. I thought this was always completely normal until I tried to remove a mole from someone's back and my hands were shaking all over the place. Doc asked me if I was nervous....nope...that's just how my hands are. Isn't everyone's like that? Apparently not. My official diagnosis is "Benign Essential Tremor." It means that a career in neurosurgery is totally out for me. This makes me feel old, you see, because I thought only old people had the shakes. Oh well. It just means I now can get out of doing things that involve sharp objects.
I think that's all for now. I'm kinda lonely here this weekend, so any calls or emails would be greatly appreciated.
1) Dr. Krazy's bullshit grated on me just a bit too much. I reported his antics to my school, and they pulled me off his rotation the next day. He then proceeded to make a total ass of himself by accusing my school of being racist. He said that they moved me to a new Dr because they found a "white" doctor.
I felt a little bad because I've never wanted to be that woman, but I think this was justified. The hospital is currently investigating his atrocious behavior.
2) I went home for Labor Day Weekend. Spent some lovely time with Roger.
Roger took this picture of our shadows on the beach. :-)
3) Congratulations to my beautiful (and older :-X) niece, Macon. She is now engaged! Looks like there will be a wedding coming up!
4) The new Dr I am working with is quite nice. Not the kind of person you'd hang out with and have a beer, but it is a much better situation than what I was in. At least I'm not taking daily abuse.
5) The weather here in WV has become just beautiful. Bright, warm sun and 59 degrees. I am quite content here right now.
6) My hands shake. I thought this was always completely normal until I tried to remove a mole from someone's back and my hands were shaking all over the place. Doc asked me if I was nervous....nope...that's just how my hands are. Isn't everyone's like that? Apparently not. My official diagnosis is "Benign Essential Tremor." It means that a career in neurosurgery is totally out for me. This makes me feel old, you see, because I thought only old people had the shakes. Oh well. It just means I now can get out of doing things that involve sharp objects.
I think that's all for now. I'm kinda lonely here this weekend, so any calls or emails would be greatly appreciated.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
September 5, 2007 7:12pm
First rotation down. Now I'm onto Internal Medicine. The doc I'm with is a bit of a nut. He is from Pakistan. That information would not be important except for that he makes it a point to mention several times each day how he's better than "white people". Day one of my rotation started off with, "All white people have Herpes. did you know that?"
Interestingly enough, he is married to a white woman. At the end of that first day when he asked me what I learned I said, "All white people have Herpes. You are married to a white woman. Therefore, you have Herpes."
The fun just went on from there.
I really dislike people like him. I don't like people who don't understand the difference between funny and offensive.
I also don't like how he talks to his patients, particularly his female patients. As soon as a female patient has a question or a problem regarding anything that he is uncomfortable with, he immediately says, "Oh, I will get my PA to talk to you. she does the female stuff."
Female stuff? Dude, checking an old guy's prostate isn't exactly the highlight of my day, but I know it has to be done.
Yesterday, one of his patients said to me "I've never talked to anyone like I'm talking to you right now. Especially not at a Dr's office." That made me feel good, but also sad knowing that this doc isn't opening that door for his patients, and I was able to do it without even really putting in too much effort.
Today he dismissed a patient from his practice, and I feel responsible. The grandaughter of the patient tore into me when I was in the room along with them. To make a long story short, this guy has bad emphysema. He gets winded easily, and his grandaughter wants him to have a portable oxygen tank. Medicare requires that your resting oxygen saturation be around 87% before you are eligible for that to be paid for. He is still way about that. Grandaughter didn't like that answer and made some remarks indicating that she will hold Dr. K personally responsible if her grandfather dies.
After she tore into me about the expensive medications grandpa has to take, and jumped all over me when I asked if he was smoking (I could smell it on him and if you smoke and have an oxygen tank with you it might BLOW UP so that was important information), I then listened to a 5 minute rant that grandpa made on every religion in the world. No idea where that came from other than the fact that he has a history of psychiatric illness. I went out into the hallway and told Dr. K about what happened in there. We went back in together. He adjusted the man's medications and then told him and grandaughter that they need to find another doctor. He then walked out of the room and dictated a letter to the secretary to put in the mail today dismissing this guy from his practice.
I guess I understand why having someone like that around is a liability, but I still felt responsible. On the other hand, once I looked through his chart more I realized that this office has been providing him with free medications via samples for the last 2 years, as well as bending over backwards to get him outside referrals and other services he needed. Sooooo, maybe this outburst was just the last straw.
On that note, I'm going to hit the books.
Interestingly enough, he is married to a white woman. At the end of that first day when he asked me what I learned I said, "All white people have Herpes. You are married to a white woman. Therefore, you have Herpes."
The fun just went on from there.
I really dislike people like him. I don't like people who don't understand the difference between funny and offensive.
I also don't like how he talks to his patients, particularly his female patients. As soon as a female patient has a question or a problem regarding anything that he is uncomfortable with, he immediately says, "Oh, I will get my PA to talk to you. she does the female stuff."
Female stuff? Dude, checking an old guy's prostate isn't exactly the highlight of my day, but I know it has to be done.
Yesterday, one of his patients said to me "I've never talked to anyone like I'm talking to you right now. Especially not at a Dr's office." That made me feel good, but also sad knowing that this doc isn't opening that door for his patients, and I was able to do it without even really putting in too much effort.
Today he dismissed a patient from his practice, and I feel responsible. The grandaughter of the patient tore into me when I was in the room along with them. To make a long story short, this guy has bad emphysema. He gets winded easily, and his grandaughter wants him to have a portable oxygen tank. Medicare requires that your resting oxygen saturation be around 87% before you are eligible for that to be paid for. He is still way about that. Grandaughter didn't like that answer and made some remarks indicating that she will hold Dr. K personally responsible if her grandfather dies.
After she tore into me about the expensive medications grandpa has to take, and jumped all over me when I asked if he was smoking (I could smell it on him and if you smoke and have an oxygen tank with you it might BLOW UP so that was important information), I then listened to a 5 minute rant that grandpa made on every religion in the world. No idea where that came from other than the fact that he has a history of psychiatric illness. I went out into the hallway and told Dr. K about what happened in there. We went back in together. He adjusted the man's medications and then told him and grandaughter that they need to find another doctor. He then walked out of the room and dictated a letter to the secretary to put in the mail today dismissing this guy from his practice.
I guess I understand why having someone like that around is a liability, but I still felt responsible. On the other hand, once I looked through his chart more I realized that this office has been providing him with free medications via samples for the last 2 years, as well as bending over backwards to get him outside referrals and other services he needed. Sooooo, maybe this outburst was just the last straw.
On that note, I'm going to hit the books.
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