August 27, 2006 8:47pm

I want a dog. I'm not a big fan of cats, mostly because of the severe allergic reaction I have whenever I am near one. Someone at school was giving away 5 puppies; half black lab, half german shepherd. i wanted one so badly I actually cried when I got in my truck and drove away and didn't have one with me.

My landlord won't let me have a pet, or I would now be the proud owner of two half lab half shepherd puppies named Miles and Coltrane, or Fred and Ginger depending on the sexes.

Thinking about dogs makes me realize how much I prefer dogs to people.

And that makes me realize how much I don't want to get married.

I sort of grew into the idea of getting married the longer DB and I were together. Maybe it's the break-up, maybe it's just me realizing I'm better off unmarried. Either way, I just really hate the idea of getting married. I know it works for a lot of people, but I just don't see it working for me.

This doesn't mean that I don't want to have someone in my life or have kids and a family of my own one day. It just means I really don't think I need to get married to have that.

I brought this up with my mom tonight. The conversation went like this:
Me: I really hate the idea of marriage. I just don't ever want to get married. It seems like a very co-dependent thing to be involved in.
Mom: But if you want to have children, being married makes it easier.
Now, there is some irony here because I think that my mother being married to my father actually made my life as a child much harder than it had to be. But I digress....
Me: You don't HAVE to be married to have kids.
Mom: Well, yeah, but, um, that's kind of, um, weird.
Me: It's only weird if you have no idea who the father is. That's very different from just not being married to him.
Mom: ::silence::

If I was pregnant, that would have been an awesome intro to that bombshell.

Maybe my thoughts on this will change one day, but I don't see that happening any time soon.

Oddly enough, I do want a family very much. My poor mother. She tries so hard not to flip out when I make decisions she doesn't agree with. The rest of my family isn't quite as accepting.

On a totally unrelated note....I want ice cream right now. I have some Breyers French Vanilla in the freezer. I have to say that I do not like it at all. It tastes sticky. Not refreshing. I'm off to find some plain ice cream that will melt nicely into an ice cream soup.